Character Interview 3

Mar 27, 201410 min read

Deviation Actions

Nakumah

Published: Mar 27, 2014

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Meme Origin:violetgateway.deviantart.com/a…

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Protagonists: Tifa and Duomongo

Character Interview
Double

1. Hey guys, I've brought you here for an interview, nothing major, it's not like you killed anyone, we just want to know about you. So can you tell me your names, gender, birthday. You know the basics information?

Tifa, fem and my birthday is my secret.

Duomongo. That is all you need to know.

2. Cool, so do you two know each other? If you do how'd you meet?

YES I KNOW HIM! FIRST HE MAKES FUN OF ME, THEN HE STEPS ON ME AND NOW A DAYS HE DOESN'T WATCH WHERE HE'S SITTING!! I THINK HE'S DOING IT ON PURPOSE!

I am not. Besides, I laughed because you are puny. And since you are puny you are hard to see sometimes. It's no wonder we have so many accidents.
LIAR! You like sitting on me! You-you-you GIANT OAF you.
What are you doing behind or underneath me all the time when I'm moving around, hm?
...

3. Ok guys, I know we kinda um… brought you here quite quickly, but um…how do you guys normally dress? Anything of importance, like a lucky charm, or a funky cap?

JEWELWRY! Lots and lots of jewelwry! A girl can't get enough of them. And the ones Dooby here makes are just *gasps* oooh just look at these bracelets!

Those are rings.
For you maybe, but they're bracelets for me. I'm never wearing them stinky bones again.
... *stares bluntly at her then turns attention to interviewer* I wear this ring. My mother gave it to me when I was still a small child. She died not long after. It's a memento to her memory.
Eesh... Is it me or is everyone missing someone in the family?

4. Awesome, well where about do you guys live? Some funky apartment? Or maybe a 30 story mansion?

Nowhere, everywhere. He's a polar bunny fluffy guy.
I am NOT FLUFFY you floor brush.
AND I'M NOT A FLOOR BRUSH YOU OVERGROWN MEAT EATING SQUIRREL.
This squirrel has tusks, razor sharp claws and jaws that can nab you like a lion to a cub! If anyone's a bunny you are!
... grumpy...

5. Sounds great, now let's find out how you think of yourselves. What do you think is the best and worst thing about you?

I'm small and agile, downside I'm small and easily stepped on... BY THIS OGRE!

Ogre?

Yes, Ogre.

*Rolls eyes* Well I guess that means that the best part of me is that I'm big but the worst part is that I step on people.
Yes sir, darn straight it is. You even stepped on Amon. Poor mal had a sore paw for weeks.
He should watch where he's going.
AND YOU SHOULD WATCH WHERE YOU'RE STEPPIN'!

6. Really? Wow…that's a bit odd, but anyway, so what do you think is the best and worst thing about the person next to you? You heard what they think but what do you think?

He's blind!

And she's stupid.
AM NOT
Which is why she's easily offended.
AM NOOOT!

7. So let's hear a bit about your history, what's your family like? Any siblings? Are your parents together? Got any girlfriends or boyfriends? What about old school friends? Come on tell me.

My family is chopped sewey. They are all botched up into a mess. *giggles* That's why I got antlers. *lifts head* and this silky fluffy neck.

Don't remember them. Just Zekroam. Not much friends either until recently. Tifa, Marcallow and Amon being amoung the few.

*Gasp!* You think me a friend!
Yep, that's why I step on you. *snicker*
*Scowl* See! YOu just heard him! I KNEW YOU WAS DOING IT ON PURPOSE!
*giggle*

8. Ok that's cool, do you work, go to school? Or are you an unemployed bum who lives on the street corner begging randoms for their spare change?

I make... stuff. And then I sell it. Humans and Uuncas alike go crazy about my stuff. Especially the Indians.

I make jewelry as a hobby. Mostly I guard these nomads.

9. Ok let's delve a bit deeper into your minds shall we. *holds up one of those card things with the ink blots on them* what do you see in this, anything significant?

*both stare blutly* Did you hit your head?

Must of hit it pretty hard if you stained that paper so. *snicker*
*interviewer scowls*

10. Wow crazy, now for a more random question. What's your favorite song, food, colour, animal, book and movie/tv show?
I'm every woman, cheese and carrots, purple, bunnies, hate books and movies are for armatures.

I'm every woman?
Problem?
Nope, not at all. Not much into music, I like seals and... though had to trade it off for salmon... my favorite color is white, falcons, history books are always good and I never seen a movie.
Today's movies suck. Our songs are better.
Some of your songs are annoying. Who sings about a dancing trout?
I DO!!!

11. So before I asked about if you had a girlfriend/boyfriend. What I was wondering is if you have experienced anything with the same sex. As in have you kissed someone of the same sex, done a bit of groping? Or maybe even more? *wiggles eyebrows in highly suggestive manner* Don't worry; it's not as if this interview will end up on the internet or anything.
NO! That would be pointless either way. The only potential mates around me now are small... too small.
Don't look at me! I'm not dating you!
*rolls eyes*

12. Hahahaha nice, what did you have for dinner last night? It can tell a lot about you.
Jerky. Tifa.
NUH UH!! NO WAY! NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER-
*Snicker* I didn't mean it that way. LOL
*statled blush* Now I feel stupid.

13. Well I was wondering what is the thing you are most afraid of. Heights, graveyards, spiders or maybe something a bit different?
Dooby's butt. It comes crashing down on me when I least expect it.
You aaree quite comfy to sit on.
*growl*
I've never really been much afraid of anything. Being in the ocean swimming against the tide? That could be frightening.

14. Do you know any other languages or maybe just a couple of words in French?
Nope. Yes. You can hear them through our songs.

15. So what is your obsession? Everyone has one or two and I want to know yours so spill.
Practicing with my antlers. Sparring. Amon is pretty good.

16. k this is the big one. What is your deepest most dark secret of all time? The one that basically no one knows. Everyone has one and I know you two do. Just spill. Only you, me and the person sitting next to you will ever know, because like I said, it's not as if this is going to end up on the internet or anything.
It wouldn't be a secret if we told you. True.

17. Ok how would you like to die and why?

Who said anything about dyin'?

He plans to kill you, maybe.
Don't worry, Dooby. I know I can count on you to sit on him.

18. So if you had three wishes what would they be? You can't ask for more wishes, bring someone back to life or true love, those are the big no no's

More jewelry, more money and for Duomongo to grow a pair of eyes on his butt. Maybe he'll stop sitting on me.
Enough with the sitting! *sigh* I'm quite content for now, so I will wish when I have something to wish for.

19. What are the three things you would take with you if you got stranded on an uninhabited island?

*whispers* I think he hit his head to hard. He thinks people plan on getting stranded and take things with them.

*Nods*

20. Ok another more slightly personal question. What do you like most in the opposite sex? Both appearance and personality wise.
Depends. If their size ain't right I already don't like'em.

*Chuckle* What size do you mean? Body or -
Shut it...
LOL. I find most fems pleasant. Save the ones I step on. *busts in laughter*
*scowl*

21. How about the same sex as yourself?

Ew...

Nelviram's colorful.
Double ew...
But I'm straight.
Still ew...

22. So what does your house normally look like? Super tidy or worse that a pig pen?

We're nomads! If we were humans our house would be a buch of cows with stuff on them. Like tents.
Don't you mean elephants?
Dooby could be my house.
Now that's just... wait... is that why your underneath me all the time? For shelter?
...n...no...

23. Wow interesting, I'm running low on questions but I think I can find a few more, ah yes, if you could change anything about yourself what would it be?
I'd be bigger than HIM! *points* Then I'D be the one doing all the sitting!

Well that's an odd picture... So does that mean I'm on the bottom?
*blush* YOU JERK!!! *jumps for a swipe*
*Giggles while she misses* There isn't much of me I want to change.

24. Um this might be slight embarrassing but remember this shouldn't end up on the net, are you are virgin at all? Or have you already had sex?

What?

She is, I'm not. And no... we don't like you.

Huh? What? What did he say? Dooby!! What did he say? Tell me.
Not important.

25. Um ok, do you believe in magic? Any sort of fantasy thing? Or are you a total non believer?
I believe in Merlin. And Music is a kind of magic, no?

Yes and no. Take your pick.

26. So this is like the last question before we let you go. What would you do if you were kidnapped and submitted to a hell of a lot of questions, that would supposedly never in a million years end up on the internet?
Poop on you.

*facepalms* What a thing to do... shame on you.
What would you do? Sit on him?
Actually I think I'd just chew him up and spit him back out.
Ew... man you got issues.

27. Ok any last words? Maybe some from your creator?

Yeah, make him stop sitting on me!

Stop going underneath me.

*me* No promises, Tifa.

Cool now as a tiny final request tag someone or a few someones, spread the meme love.